It’s very easy to break down and cry when faced with an affair but if you want a higher chance of moving forward, even towards reconciling with your partner, the most important thing you will ever do to survive infidelity is pulling yourself together, taking control of your emotions, and allowing yourself to be rational – even if it hurts.
When faced with infidelity, many couples believe that it may be best to end their marriage. While separation or divorce is a viable option in many cases, have you ever considered that surviving an affair means rebuilding, reconnecting and making major decisions that can spell a difference in your life? Together?
Upon discovering your partner’s infidelity, it is perfectly normal and understandable that you may be feeling emotionally overwhelmed, betrayed and in pain.
However, it will be vital for you to see the big picture and try to understand where you and your partner are, what caused the affair, and where you want to go from here.
Do you want to recover from the pain of infidelity?
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A healthy dose of understanding will go a long way – even if it results in uncovering deep problems you, your partner or your relationship have that may have caused this crisis.
You will also need to upgrade your communication skills. Clamming up will not help. Talking to one another in a calm, mature, sensible manner will help you achieve more than screaming and shouting.
If you or your partner are willing to stay together, you have to BOTH want it. If you are the betrayed partner, you will need to let go, accept and start the process of forgiveness.
If you are the unfaithful partner, you must be willing to do everything you can to regain your partner’s trust, to let go and cut ties with the other party and to sincerely express remorse over your infidelity.
Do you want to recover from the pain of infidelity?
Click here to visit the Save my marriage today website!
Meanwhile, both of you will require self-awareness, understanding of your personal issues and motivations, and the willingness to gain inner happiness. This is one of the most important steps you can take to move forward in your life, especially after a crisis. It will also relieve both of you of the burden of relying on the other for your happiness.
Two broken individuals make a broken a relationship. To make your relationship whole, you must work on being whole yourself.
Becoming self-aware will help you gain insight into why the affair happened in the first place. If you have been unfaithful to your partner, do you even know why?
If you were the partner left behind, have you stopped to consider what the quality of your relationship was before this happened?
Learn to address the reasons for the affair. Work through your feelings and focus on healing rather than destroying – even if healing means that you and your partner need to separate, temporarily or indefinitely; or even if healing means confronting the problems in your relationship.
Finally, no one ever said that surviving infidelity will be easy, nor will there be quick fixes or one-size-fits-all solutions. With patience, maturity and forgiveness it may all just be worth it.
