How to Prevent Adultery In Your Marriage

smmt_250x2501An extramarital affair often occurs when a spouse feels a sense of something lacking in the marriage. A wayward partner is compelled to go off with someone else if they feel starved for love or attention in some way.

That’s why an incomplete marriage faces the danger of adultery – finding fulfillment through a third party seems like an acceptable option for a cheating partner.

This is where the danger begins. A lacking marriage can drive a spouse to seek another person with whom they can vent their frustrations to.

Matters could be further complicated if the person they are confiding with is a member of the opposite sex. Adultery will follow if a twisted kind of attraction develops between the hurting partner and the “shoulder to cry on”.

Wanting to feel the rush of discovering a new “love”, a confused spouse may seek solace in another person’s arms to soothe the pain of a failed marriage.

In a relationship, there are telltale signs which could be precursors to an extramarital affair. If these symptoms are left ignored and left unchecked, they may very well push one of you into cheating.

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Below are a few tips you should remember in order to keep your own marriage from the danger of infidelity. As they say, it’s easier to prevent damage than undo it.

1. Communication is non-negotiable

You need a healthy way of expressing your thoughts and ideas to your spouse that it won’t result in a nasty backlash. Remember, if you’ve come to a point where talking to your partner seems like an impossible task, the intimacy in your marriage is likely to suffer as well. It’s simply a matter of cause and effect.

So, get to the cause of your problems by stepping up your efforts towards communicating better. This is the only way to close an existing gap between you two or keep one from growing in the first place.

However, you need to take great care in keeping things on a positive note. Don’t ever compromise the element of respect because that’s what keeps arguments from getting worse.

The best way to keep disagreements constructive is by focusing on your emotions, and not on attacking your spouse. Stating what you feel targets the root of the matter and keeps you from throwing accusations.

If your spouse did or said something offensive, tell him or her how you felt and ask them for their feedback.

So, it’s also important to listen with an open ear and wait for your spouse to finish before talking. Though criticism is not the easiest thing to listen to, your partner also needs to air his or her side. While it may seem like a tough habit to maintain, healthy communication is beneficial in the long run.

2. Be honest with yourself.

Let’s face it, no one is the perfect partner, and we all have our own shortcomings. Have the strength and humility to objectively evaluate yourself.

Make a thorough list of your strengths and weaknesses as a spouse. Increase your self-awareness by enumerating the things you can do to be a better partner.

Striving to maintain your good side and the willingness to change your unlovable traits will reduce the likelihood of adultery in the marriage.

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3. Keep the spark alive.

When boredom settles in, it can be a breeding ground for an extramarital affair. As a spouse, you share the equal responsibility of keeping the relationship fresh and exciting no matter how long you’ve been married.

Be pro-active enough to set weekly or monthly dates and make time to be together. As I said, a lack of intimacy could lead to adultery.

Also, don’t underestimate the importance of regular physical closeness, whether it’s cuddling or actual sex. A romantic relationship must involve passion, even if it doesn’t always culminate in intercourse.

Don’t let this part of your marriage slide because a deprived partner may go off to fulfill their needs through an extramarital affair. Consult with a specialist or read books about improving your sex life.

4. Don’t forget yourself.

It’s easy to start neglecting your personal needs once you get caught up in the daily responsibilities of married life. However, this also poses a danger to the relationship.

If you don’t take the time to unwind and rediscover yourself, you can end up getting burned out and miserable. Everyone has a breaking point, so you need to schedule some quality “alone time” to regain your bearings and to refresh your weary self.

There are different outlets for accumulated stress. You can try reading, exercising or taking up a hobby to give you a momentary diversion from the stress of maintaining your relationship.

It’s alright to be a dedicated spouse, but remember to retain your individual identity in the marriage.

If you look at the big picture, giving yourself the occasional breather keeps you from being unhappy. As you’ve probably guessed by now, a happier and fulfilled spouse is more unlikely to entertain thoughts of adultery.

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